The Shadowbird

2006-12-30T21:08:00.000-08:00

Gary's Return

With each passing second, the chilling winds from the north becomes harsher and more frigid than before as December slips away on to January; quite unusual for a tropical country like ours. Obviously, for every phenomenon, there’s always a scientific explanation, no matter how perplexing the event is. Let’s face a fact here, the climate’s changing because of the melting ice caps in the Arctic and the ever-increasing global temperature. But how about this for instance: a walking encyclopedia that has returned from the States suddenly sends you a text message and invites you to a one-day bonding session in a graveyard? One of the strangest phenomena in my life since Jayvee’s sudden transformation from stout to stick! Hehehe! Well, so much for metaphors, the point is that my friend since nursery has returned to wreak havoc once more! Yes indeed, Gary is back with that same know-it-all attitude and that sneer that has always spelled mischief and wit in every conversation. Today was actually gonna be a dreadfully boring day, if it weren’t for Gary’s presence. Thank God! So basically, we were supposed to meet up in XS at around 3pm with Gary, JA, Zeig, Niccolo and Nichel. From there, we will head off all the way to Heritage Memorial Park, somewhere along C-5 and Fort Bonifacio, just to give Gary a chance to pay his last respects to our dear classmate, Mark. Early on at 2:30, I managed to arrive at XS without spying anybody at all there (what a drag!), so dad dropped me off and went back home. Meanwhile, my instincts told me that a freak like Gary most probably hangout at Ash Creek, that’s why I took a short walk to that place and along the way, I spotted a tall yet slim guy wearing a fisherman’s hat with a typical F4 haircut. As I veered right to get a closer look, the guy suddenly looked at me, those same Korean-like features that are of nobody else’s besides, GARY! See what three years have done to this freak? Hahaha! After that, we had a chat at Starbucks and waited for JA and his battalion to come to us, and they did! (Thanks for helping me add 3 more stickers to the Starbucks planner thingy) Around 3:30, we carpooled in JA’s car and sped off to Heritage Park. The weather was fine and sunny, not to mention it was kinda chilly (duh!) As the car went along EDSA, Gary shared with us some info about Raymond (who has been earning $20.00 per hour in Microsoft as a junior applicant programmer) and some of his experiences in the States, including about his dormmates; I really laughed my pants off upon hearing it from him! Haha! The first one was a faggot who actually thought a first that Gary didn’t know how to speak English (cuz Gary wanted to play a prank on him), and was so depressed since he had nobody to talk to in the dormitory so he cries every night and even calls up his mom just to say how bad he felt. Soon after, Gary revealed the truth to the guy and the latter got pissed so he got even by inviting his boyfriend to the dorm room every night to have anals as Gary slept. The second was a street punk who got into college miraculously and he somehow influenced Gary in selling crack and weed, but of course he turned away from it in the end, without first getting some cash! Hehehe! The last guy was merely an abusive, good-for-nothing jerk who constantly slapped his girlfriend; yet it had always been Gary to the rescue without inflicting violence. He also emphasized the true beauty of the Philippine’s countryside as compared to that in the States. As he said so himself, “The city life is fine, ok dun, pero ang pangit sa countryside! Mas OK dito, at least close to nature diba? Doon, kahit may deer and a few tumbleweeds, God, it sucked!” Going back to the trip, the gang and I arrived at the cemetery around 4:30 due to misdirection and slight traffic. Haha! The whole place was a meadow of finely trimmed grass, riddled with small inconspicuous tombstones, but as a whole, it was a beautiful place; yet of course, sadness shrouds that very aspect. Mark’s grave was simple yet elegant, and it is designated by a peaceful creek nearby with the winds caressing its flow. Soon, we did some sightseeing around the place and posed within the newly constructed pagoda: the place was creepy in a way but hey, the building was very Chinese! :P Around 6pm in the evening, we left the memorial park and headed for dinner in a restaurant near my house. Apparently, Gary made that huge mistake by trusting his younger brother, Gerard, that the prices for the viands were affordable with discount, since he has connections there. But unfortunately, out of courtesy (since kilala ako ng may-ari and bawal daw magbackout ng reservation), we ate there and we ordered only rice and some chicken, how embarrassing! I mean, the waiters were looking at us and they’re wondering how the heck are these kids gonna pay for their meal? Perhaps they’ve gotten accustomed to seeing parents and older guys pay big money for set meals, etc, but five teenagers was another thing, something new! Fast-forwarding, after eating, Lester and Oli dropped by the resto to catch up with us as we headed for Dencio’s to have a real decent dinner together hahaha! Oh by the way, Gary took care of our so-called meal back in the Chinese resto. Arriving at Dencio’s we waited for Ervin, Raffy and Karl to join us for the dinner and as they appeared by the stairs, all were surprised to see the new Gary in his “Amazing FACE” spoof t-shirt and that peculiar hair-do of his hahaha! Later on, Foody and Benny followed afterwards and drank some beer with Raffy.. first time ah! Haha! The night culminated with all ten of us going to Powerplay in Ortigas for some games of CS for maybe 3-4 hours! We’re a bunch of addicts!!! Hahaha! Oh well, for old times’ sake. J Indeed, this day somehow marked the forthcoming of a prosperous and harmonious new year for my beloved friends and I; yet still we must all push through as life goes on in college and in our families. Gary really made this day special for all of us; and for once, I feel assured that his trip back here to the Philippines truly meant something on his part. High 4-D for life and Happy New Year! :)

2006-12-24T08:19:00.000-08:00

Walkin' in MY Winter Wonderland...

Just a day to go and the most awaited day of the month will come to pass. Christmas indeed is everyone's favorite season of the year; no doubt it is a perfect time for family get-togethers and celebrations everywhere. Personally, I am looking forward to a pleasant holiday season, and yes, events are going well as expected. So far my daily affairs since the start of my vacation have come and gone smoothly- I am somewhat enjoying my semi-sedentary routines at home, reading the books that Greys gave me, while sitting my ass off in front of the computer downloading some new songs (possibly jazzed up Christmas songs) and turning on the speaker to full blast for some good music. Hahaha! Aside from those, I have also gotten the chance to frolic with my cousins over at their houses, since we were bound to pay them a visit anyhow. Sometimes, when I feel that bumming around was the last thing I would resort to do, dad would simply tap into my mind and ask my sis and I to go with him for a nice trip to the malls. In addition, gifts from my relatives and friends continuously pour in, and I am truly grateful for each and every present that I have received from them. Christmas is truly around the corner, but one thing is for certain, the feeling is no longer the same. As a student, I am constantly bothered by requirements that are due after the vacation, yet it is merely nothing compared to problems faced by other unfortunate individuals. Let's face a fact here, our childhood memories and days of Christmas are obviously numbered, well, although not entirely, but sometimes, as an adult, one would feel that the spirit of Christmas, that same spirit of joy and anticipation no longer exists or has left us to our deepest thoughts of everyday ordeals, etc. Perhaps we have outgrown and discarded that persistent hopeful disposition of an innocent child has always possessed, or maybe perhaps it is MISTAKABLY outgrown by most of us adults. Even in the face of such harsh realities in life, one should never let go of the child within; their nature serves as our guide to becoming more faithful and believing to the true meaning of Christmas. Many view that this season of hope is their one-way ticket out from their miseries in life, but let's not forget that there is never an easy way out, there is always a simpler way out. It could be achieved by asking grace from the Lord and giving one's best shot at anything. Simple, no? :P I'll leave it at that in the meantime, I can only hope that I may be enlightened to find a solution for my future problems hahaha!. For now, let's enjoy the holidays with clear hearts and minds that are bound for the love and service of others.. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND GOD BLESS! =)

2006-12-15T05:23:00.000-08:00

Going...Going...Gone?

The much-awaited Christmas vacation is drawing near, but the burden of the ever-increasing load of school work still haunts all of us. For the past few weeks, we have been working nonstop just to catch along with the pace of our various subjects. Clearly, the profs are also trying to keep up in accomplishing all the necessary lessons in order to smoothly proceed to the prelims by next year. Personally, I am quite pleased that my class is nearing the completion of everything required, yet I feel somewhat depressed over my recent performance in class. Although I can never be too sure about the final outcome of my quizzes in some subjects, my instincts whisper out precepts of impending failure if I keep this up. I do not know what has gotten into me recently, but I seem to be thinking and acting so differently from before. Is my sanity slipping away? Or am I just allowing my mind to drift away for so long, and reality has become the surreal aspect of my world. Only recently we've had our monthly examination in biochemistry. The questions were kinda tough, and yes, I believe that those could be answered properly if and only if they've given us sufficient time. Who would have thought that were only granted an hour to finish the entire test! So as the test came to an end, I ended up moping about and worrying of the possible results. Damn it, the thought of failing has now found a place in my mind and it is simply hard to take away. I can't let that ruin my Christmas, no chance in hell. So much for academics, I've received news from my profs that I am handpicked by the whole Faculty of Pharmacy department to represent in the "Pautakan" contest to be held, according to Monica, in February next year. Now that's something I don't hear everyday, hahaha! Still, I will have to cope up with many agenda for next week, including the coinciding monthly of my biochem lec and the battle of the wits on Monday. Geez, what a drag! Oh well, that's really life, but of course, I am acknowledging the help and support of my classmates who were there to guide me throughout. You know who you guys are. ;) Anywayz, got to cut it from here; the assembly line of assignments awaits me. Ciao and God bless! Merry Christmas to all!

2006-11-10T19:22:00.000-08:00

Off With A Bad Start :(

That's right, school has finally resumed its course after a month of sleeping and RnR; though it wasn't as warm and exciting as I had in mind, well not until yesterday that is. But before I narrate about what had happened, let me discuss about the subjects and schedule designated for my class. As expected, the second semester subjects of this year are meant to fill in where our lessons from where the previous semester had left off. Along with it came new concepts that obviously require the application of the bits and pieces we've learnt from the past few months. So far, yes, the subjects seem interesting enough: Biochemistry, Quantitative Chemistry, Physics, English, Literature and Sociology. However, alongside the subjects, we were entrenched in a very awkward schedule. Imagine this, you have to wake up at around 5am everyday (except Friday since classes start at 9am) just to catch up with your class, which begins at 7am, and not to mention that we are bound to be dismissed at 7pm every Thursday. Damn. Enough of the schedule proper; let's talk about the profs. First of all, I'm glad to say that our class had been spared from the wrath of the terror profs in any of the major subjects. Instead, we were assigned with some of the finest and youngest professors in their respective fields. I guess luck had been with us all along, even when our intuition told us that we were bound to get don't-fuck-with-me type of teachers, like the Physics prof who got pissed with Hya for merely commenting on the time limit during our exam in botany. Thankfully our profs right now were as angelic as hell. (whoa!) Secondly, let me describe them one by one: a.) Ms.Irene dela Cruz of Biochem. is a cool prof who could actually relate with us all, while delivering a clear and comprehensive lesson with full clarity. She indeed tries to make things simpler for the class. b.) Ms. Gabona of our Quanti. Chem. is also another pleasing figure who is really enthusiastic in teaching the subject matter. The way I see it, she seems like the next Wynda Benito (my high school math teacher) c.) Ms. Lilia Firme, our Literature and English professor is no doubt one of the "immortals" given her age and all. But no offense to that, although I would have to admit that her mind and philosophy is actively on the go, and that is indeed a good thing for my class. Just what we need, a tinge of wisdom from a person like her. She looks like a kind prof, unworthy of taunts and disrespect; yet, some of us just can't help making fun of her voice, pronunciation and posture.. gosh, I really wonder why pick on an old innocent lady, right? d.) Ms. Helenida Onal, our Sociology/ Theology prof is another interesting individual. As she approached the table, she gave us an impression which commanded respect. At first I thought that she was one prof not to be messed around with because of her intimidating visage and her noticeable tone which hinted that of sarcasm, but when pleasantries were exchanged between her and the class, we found her to possess a gentle personality in her own way. Humor of course never ran out from her, but I doubt if some of her remarks could be accepted without question from some members of the class, especially those of different races. e.) Ms. Gisella Lebron, our all-time favorite prof.! Who would expect that she would actually become our chem and physics lab instructor? Praise the Lord! So there you have it, some profs we've encountered so far, although I have disregarded some of course. Anyway, I am now going to talk about my own experiences. The first day was in fact a day worth reliving- being able to see your friends again after a long vacation truly brings such gladness to one's heart. Yes, especially when the heart is really longing for a special someone. Tonks and I got along pretty well for the first two days, yet sometime in between we had our certain misunderstandings, but in the end we were able to patch it all up and go on again; yet, I cannot remove the doubt that she is in deep thought about something yesterday. I insisted in knowing, but I'd rather find out for myself. At first I was really pondering over what was bothering her and she just said that I can't help her in that ordeal, until she suddenly mentioned about an itch. From there I knew that something was amiss, although I know for a fact that she's telling the truth, there is one big itch! Later on that afternoon, everything simply blew into my face during our Physics period when I had declined to lend her the money to pay for the purchase of our book. She was furious and tried to ignore me all the way to the time when I had alighted from the train. Despite the fact that I knew I had the money then to lend her for the book's payment, I instinctively chose not to, because of typical reasons such as saving, etc. It was then I felt so lousy for doing so. How could I have overlooked, or even disregarded the fact that she's in dire need of money that time? Why the hell did I simply refuse and deny?? What has happened to sacrificing for one's friends? Selfishness and perhaps indifference got the best of me that day, and how painful it is for me to think that the damage is already done. As she rebuked me, shame wrapped me to the point where I could say no more, but only to listen to what she had to say. It was then I realized that I have only grasped the essence of taking, and not giving, nor have I shown full appreciation of the things that others have done for me; thus, she declared that she would not seek out my help any longer for what I just did. Those words singed through my heart and I was dumbfounded. Indeed, for once I felt like a real fool to have done such a thing; therefore, I am wholeheartedly willing to discard my attitude and turn over a new leaf for Tonks. Apologies, I know, are insufficient to make up for my faults of the past; if only I would be given another chance to prove myself, something that I could truly accomplish without having to lie and bluff about in the end. This time I will make sure that my contributions are done sincerely and selflessly. Once again, I am really sorry for what I've done. Let me get another chance to become the friend that you once had trusted so dearly.

2006-11-03T12:00:00.000-08:00

The End Sires a New Beginning

Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned almost into a month as I lingered about in the comfort of my own house. Frankly speaking, everything had been quite monotonous. As I have awoken from my sleep from the previous night, I thought of nothing else but to enkindle the wanderlust within me. What could be a better solution to the persisting boredom, but to get out there and enjoy a day with one's buddies. With a stroke of luck, the car would have been easily in my grasp; yet, sometimes, the world would turn against me and give me the finger, and I'm left with no choice but to enjoy the simple pleasures at home. As expected, school days are drawing closer as this week reaches the end my vacation and the start of the second semester. Of course, I had to maximize to at least make the most of the precious minutes left of my month-long break. Spending the whole day in front of the tube or the computer was too commonplace an activity for me; yet, I could always enjoy a lively and decent conversation with Tonks over the phone from time to time; and although there were many hindrances that came in our way to keep in touch, I made it a point to find any ways possible to talk with Tonks. :) Thoughts have been running across my mind for these few days; most likely these are manifestations of my expectations and insights for the future. More often than not, they were about my friends, academic challenges tthat yet to befall me and many others. Despite the possibility of shortcomings, I had assured myself that problems could be rationally resolved, or as much as possible, be avoided at all costs. However, who is to blame when a shitload of badluck should arise and take it's course on me? As a friend of mine had once said: "No man is a virgin, life screws everyone." For now, I would really want to tread along life and forego my pessimism about my life at all costs, because I firmly believe that amidst the misfortunes that may occur, hope, reconciliation and peace are just nearby, awaiting those who are willing to make things better for everyone. I wish the best of luck to everyone in the second semester and God bless you all.

2006-10-22T00:50:00.000-07:00

The Bittersweet Days...

An endless procession of days and nights went by as I longed for the company of friends and loved ones. Well what can you expect from a guy like me who is bummed at home for almost three weeks without seeing my buddies, especially to those I've held so dear to my heart; although I have had the chance to stroll around in malls and shop with my parents, I merely felt that I am not at all satisfied. I am dying to be with my friends- from both high school and college. Of course, the badminton sessions that I am having with Harris and the other guys (JJ, Nic and Jeremy) was another thing. Yes, as each day passed, I have never given up hope that one of these days, within the duration of this semestral break, I would grasp the opportunity to be able to meet up with my friends, even if it is only a short roadtrip around Metro Manila, or a simple gathering in the park, it will serve. Yesterday was just another day at home, and as expected, my best friends for the day were none other than the computer, mp3 player, and the book my nose is currently stuck to. So there, I spent the entire day doing nothing but treading up the ladder of vanity as I took selfshots and did nothing with them in the end..weird? Bored? Not entirely. I was chatting with Tonks (one my closest buddies in UST) about anything under the sun. I really enjoyed her company even when I had a bad start in the morning with my sister and mom (don't ask ><) She really never fails to enliven a conversation, which is one of her most admirable traits. Seeing that we're on the edge of dying out of boredom, we planned to have chat over the line sometime later. As evening approached, I sought the opportunity to speak to her personally over the phone, ensuring first that the coast was clear for a conversation, meaning to say that the potential for interruptions from my sister is negligible. Just then dad asked me to accompany him to SM Mega to buy some construction and repair materials for our shower room (the heavy sliding door is dangerously going off its track and there is a major leak in the pipes). Knowing that the chances of having a clean and meaningful talk with Tonks is slimming down for every minute that I remain outside, so I insisted my dad that we search for parts at lightspeed. Around 930pm, we were able to get everything and when I anticipated the trip home, I eventually informed Tonks that we are heading for my grandparents' house to discuss about the agenda that had taken place a while ago (my cousin's wedding). Disheartened by that, I immediately told Tonks about it, and of course, she too felt the same way, but what can I do? It was a family affair, it would be so embarrassing to refuse. It would seem as though I wasn't part of the family, if that's the case.The talk between the old ones lasted for around an hour and a half, although it excites me to listen and talk about my cousin's love life and post-wedding plans, the rest of the conversation landed on the topic of distant relatives totally unknown to me! I just wondered how could these old folks of mine persist up until 11pm to talk about this and that, while they could actually settle it the following morning in the reception?! Sheesh! So, I dozed off, hoping that when I wake up in 30mins or so, the talk would be over and we're going straight home, because it would be asking too much of Tonks to wait for me that long. But I was wrong, the talk was prolonged to another 30mins. Crap! :( While going home, I could feel that Tonks was so willing to grill me once we get in touch for making her wait too long a time. Yes, I realized that I was inconsiderate of her time, I apologized but she disregarded what I had to say and left the chat, weary and disappointed about me. Regret and shame embraced me as I went to bed, feeling so cold and insecure throughout the night. I should have declined my dad's request, but what kind of a personality will I project to my dad in the end? Saturday night ended gloomily for me, and Sunday followed as the bright morning sun greeted warmth into my face, but not enough to invigorate me. Throughout the whole wedding, I was appointed the inofficial cameraman as took a bunch of pics for some relatives while at the same time, had shots of for my own. The reception took place soon after in the Makati Shangrila Hotel in the same ballroom where my friend, Ginger, had her prestigious debut in the form of a Viennese ball. Overall, the day was alright, but of course I went home while bearing a troubled look and feel... Good day. Sorry sis :(

2006-10-07T12:25:00.000-07:00

Wasted 'till the End of the Century...

For those who have been anticipating a new entry from me for the past few weeks, well, fat chance for all of us since the days before were as hectic as one could imagine! The preliminary period started off fairly, and as expected, new lessons and countless requirements had begun to plague our peaceful lives once again. The subjects were the same as usual. Organic chemistry, due to the constraint in time, it became a little more difficult for me to handle with all the unnecessary assignments, plays and programs we need to take care of. Despite all that, I was able to manage them anyhow and get on with passing the quizzes. Nevertheless, our profs introduced more concepts and reactions that we are to familiarize and understand, which fortunately, I have been able to do so with my overloaded mind. Literature posed no problem at the very early stages of the preliminary period, until good old Sir Marasigan announced that we are to perform any of Shakespeare's plays within a time allotment of 30-45 minutes. At the displeasure of the others, sir was showing off that sadistic grin of his, while I rubbed my hands and was overjoyed to hear of his proposal. Immediately, I was able to suggest to the group that we take up the quitessential story of young love, as portrayed by none other than Romeo and Juliet. For days and nights, I prepared and even took time to polish the shortened and simplified version of the script; and just when the day of our performance drew near, Millenia struck the country like a blitzkrieg from hell. Thus, our plans of practicing and preparing were ruined before our very eyes. Seeing that things were going poorly for both groups (and after raising so much commotion and arguments within the class), sir simply asked for a memoir instead..something which can be done by either an individual or by a group of people. We eventually agreed, and went to work once we got home. My partner and I enjoyed doing the memoir. It was really a piece of cake, not to mention a nostalgic and heartwarming task. Hahaha! For this week alone, the professors bombarded us with countless requirements, in preparation for the finals exams that will take place next week. I mean, what the heck? The students lack freaking sleep and R and R! The profs were obviously expecting that their students could actually accomplish tons of assignments, projects and review sessions for upcoming quizzes and rehearsals for specific presentations at their own convenience! What's up with these old peeps? Haven't they ever heard of chilling out and taking it easily for once? Sheesh! What nerds! Their proposed action simply creates an impression upon our college- that we are a bunch of antisocial and eccentric workaholics who are too engrossed with school work! Also, the fact that UST had been able to squester the crown from Ateneo as reigning champion of the 69th season in the UAAP was indeed a do-or-die matter for many Thomasians; but as for the Faculty of Pharmacy, sad to say, we were simply too preoccupied and too geeky to celebrate, unwind and savor the victory that has been bestowed upon our university.. Fun? What's that?! *scratches head* Oohhh, I think I will have to research on that subject!!! ><

2006-09-02T22:30:00.000-07:00

The Aftermath of the Hell Week

The preliminary grading period has finally come to an abrupt end after ages! I'm glad to say that I've been able to slip onwards to the finals after exhausting weeks of blissful yet sleepless nights. Amidst the rejoicing and alleluias of a successful grading period, my ever-reliable intuition constantly haunts me of the possibility of attaining unfavorable results during our preliminary examinations. Why do these thoughts always have to apprehend me? Perhaps I'm simply being too pessimistic all of a sudden these days, and the envisages of an imminent failure could be merely the effects of such thoughts.I've got to admit, the week completely drained my neurons and CSF down to 1 unit and 1 ml, respectively. Bwahaha! Exagg? I don't think so. I'm totally losing myself! Could this be dementia? Possibly. :(

The exam week went on the typical way as usual- you know, with all the pressure, cramfests and review sessions that take place- things just don't seem to blend much with my presently dominant aura of confidence and optimism. On the first day of our examinations, we braced ourselves for the most unexpected encounter with organic chemistry. Suffice to say, the tests were formidable, challenging to a certain extent, which spells no room for errors. After the test I felt that uncomfortable sensation in my head; it throbbed like there's no tomorrow and the heat of the closing afternoon seared my face like a hot iron rod fresh from the embers, but I succeeded in burying it at the back of my mind for a while though. Subsequently,. I studied for the other subjects that are to follow the next few days ahead without much of any problems at all. Everything went well with the minor subjects, until the day came for us to face Phyana. Talk about the first ever blitzkrieg of Sir Matro upon the class of 2GMT! Phyana lab posed no threat whatsoever at all; however the lecture component was such a big pain in the behind! The test per se was of the average level in terms of difficulty, but there was a part where corrections are supposed to be made on specific words, which could have been the source of the downfall of our grade in the test. As much as I would like to overly criticize the degree of difficulty of the test, I'd rather not say a word about it anymore. Don't ask why. So there, my classmates headed back home to study hopelessly for the last day that will cover up English and PGC. At the stroke of 3pm on September 2, 2006, the examinations have finally met their ends. Just when we felt that we had left no stone unturned, we realized that there is still a pending performance of the class's groups' jazz chants! Yes, there's in fact so much more to be taken care of. To get things over with, my group had arranged to accomplish everything this morning by brushing up on our lines and settling the choreographies and tune. Guess what? the day was tiring as hell! Imagine this, early in the morning I had my mom drop me off at school, then I waited for my friend to arrive there as well since I was to accompany her in retrieving an invitation. So, I spend an hour and a half on an adventure to Katipunan and back, exhausting nearly P50 to and fro. but at least I was compensated in the end. Wahaha! ;p We were able to return to UST at around 10am, "just in time" for the practice. What can I say, the venue was appropriate with the morning sun, the scent of colorful blossoming flowers near the main building's facade and the mild trickle of the fresh morning dew on your face...Ah yes, it was so invigorating! Of course, my group wasn't alone at Lovers' Lane, we had some company there such as Group 1 (our greatest nemesis) and the groups belonging to other sections as well. To our surprise, the former's blockings weren't as lively and interesting the way we had expected that they would be. An advantage? Why not? Hahaha! Serves 'em right! We're gonna make sure that we kick ass and that we are not just some backwater of the class. Durugin and group 1! Yeah Fitz! Hahahaha! I've got two words for them....oh never mind. Hahaha! Basically we have been able to patch up some moves and grooves upto the last page (what a miracle!) but of course we still lack some practice to perfect certain parts. I've got to admit, the girls were superb in their parts, but as for the guys, I guess they are simply too eager to make an exhibitionists' showdown! Hahahaha! Anyway, after the practice we all headed home with wasted and haggard looks on our faces. Perhaps that's what I would like to call as dedication. At least the plan has paid off to a certain extent, but I believe that my group would prove their point in the end. God bless and goodluck sa lahat! Peace out to group 1. Nothing personal, it's just business... hahahaha!

2006-08-11T14:00:00.000-07:00

The Dark Side Clouds Me...

Just when things started to turn out right (or rather what seems like it) for the first few weeks of August, fate and luck gave me the finger behind my back and hence, I strolled along as usual with my life as a student, ignorant of the misfortunes that are to befall me. "Life's full of ups and downs", a cliché that shall hold true for all eternity, but in my case its kinda different. I would assess the present to have more of downs than ups; and not mention the shitload of downs that have recently happened for consecutive times already. Indeed, I am really ticked off by all those. For example, my performance in class is getting somewhat flimsy. I don't know why. Because of all these, I asked myself whether or not the problem lies in me alone, or the feng shui experts were accurate enough to foresee my "unlucky year" and I am bound to living a hellish year ahead of me. Whatever force is behind all this, I will have to face them someday, and I am confident that a last remaining luck will always be there to help me overcome. ;)

For the past few days and weeks, I have been experiencing some emotional and psychological distress due to confidential reasons (don't bother asking). The reasons themselves are sufficient enough to cause instability within me, but still I tried hard to fight them off so as to forget about all that. Unfortunately, I am relatively weak in controlling my thoughts and feelings since it was sort of a low blow. Due to this, I developed a somewhat cynical outlook upon other people recently; and sorry to say, I am also easily irritated. I know, who would want a very unfavorable and depressing view of life, right? But as I mentioned earlier, all the s*** that's happening all of a sudden are piling up at light speed to the point I can no longer hold off and keep my psyche intact. I just wanted to shout at the top of my alveoli and let go of the angst within. Yet I am a passive type of person so I express them all via writing; violence is never an option for me, unless truly necessary. Hopefully the ordeal will end soon, and I may return to my cheerful and optimistic self. As for today, wood was just added to the fire when I encountered my friend ignoring me. Hoping that talk would resolve the matter, my friend preferred walking away. It appears that I have done something wrong again unconsciously yesterday, or maybe none at all? This is just it, I can't stand being the subject of one's unpleasant disposition anymore; plus, I'm sick of becoming a mere anger outlet... what happened to our deal? :( Generally, I feel so worthless and insignificant lately (Alam ko hindi ako ganun. I am never such a person! But still some try to make me feel that way, pinapagalitan dahil lamang sa isang bulok na electric fan, amp!!!). Warning, my boiling point is but five degrees away, so be careful... Sana lang things will be back to normal, because I just can't take it anymore. Peace na lang sana eh noh. :( God bless you all. God please help me...As for my last and remaining luck in this world, I'm sorry..

2006-07-24T08:50:00.000-07:00

To Hell and Back...

One thing is for certain, the previous week proved to be my most memorable and crucial of all..for now, and do you wanna know why? Well for one I had committed my first crime on the road (yet unanimously pardoned in the end), and almost ended up killing an old lady inside a taxi cab by accident. Before going into the details, here's a very short recap of of what happened over the week: From Monday to Tuesday we had our final discussions in our subjects due to the upcoming monthly exams for the remaining days of the week, thus, we were hoping to accomplish everything within that span of time. And so we did, all topics were thoroughly reviewed, sufficient for us to recall the lesson proper. As for Wednesday to Friday, we took our exams according to schedule and fortunately there weren't any disruptions then. The tests were formidable and although some were quite challenging, I managed to finish them all with relative ease anyway.So there, after our last exam for the week (cuz we still have chem to deal with next week), the guys and I decided to chill out by playing badminton. We played for around 3-4 hours or so, and wow, the thought of not being able to sway your back smoothly nor to walk upright with ease was simply unbearable.After the game, I was enlivened upon knowing that my high school barkada was gonna have a gimmick the following day, and I was really excited by that, so I went home early and slept for quite a while after bathing. Around 11pm I went online and agreed with Hya that we'd meet tomorrow at school for the Yoga session then I texted Monica to ask if she would go in tomorrow, but to no avail, she didn't reply. Afterwards, I was knocked down straight to my bed, hopeful that the next day will be a blast for me..and indeed it was. The next day I woke up quite panicky that I wouldn't make it on time for the class since it was allotted on 9am, exactly, and it was 5 minutes from that time; thus, I simply put on my green shirt and jogging pants and drove off on my own to school. Just then I had this weird feeling that something odd is gonna take place, since this is my first time to drive off to UST alone. Along the way, I was hoping that Hya wouldn't get all impatient and doubtful of my attendance there, so I drove fast enough while cautioning myself at the same time.As I arrived at school and found a parking space, I immediately went for the Educ bldg and upon reaching the elevator, I met up with Hya and we went up together.As we reached the room of the yoga club, we found ourselves a suitable spot and joined in the warm up, even without any yoga mats. hahaha! So there, to wrap things up, we had several stretching poses that were incorporated with patterned breathing exercises. Overall it was a relaxing and fun experience! Fast-forwarding to 12noon, Hya and I left school and headed towards Gateway where she asked me to drop her off. Before I was able to cross the bridge back to Gilmore, a guy somehow went to my door and demanded that I go out and negotiate about me bumping into the side of his Innova. I insisted that I passed through smoothly and I did not feel or hear any bump of any sort, and at that he impatient and pulled his gun out and pointed the damn thing at me and retorted that I come out or my life was his to take. Fear struck me like a dagger stabbed through the chest.. because of that I became irrational and had to flee for my life, so I sped off along the intersection like a carjacker, and out of panic, I neglected the presence of a taxi in front of me and braced for a collision course with the vehicle. The scenario was a disaster. My car's hood flipped open from the left as the taxi's compartment was shattered badly. At that point, my mind was going haywire as I panicked and looked for a way out of this double jeopardy. So I ran and ran and ran, despite the fact that I knew what heinous crime I had just committed. As I reached the next stoplight, the guy trailed behind me with a blaring siren on his Innova, then he caught me and told me to shut off the car; just then, an MMDA officer came along as well. It was then I knew how much damage I had caused due to my panic. Not only did I accidentally collide with another car, but also I had run over the feet of these two guys, causing them excruciating pain as they walked. I also realized that the Innova guy was actually a right-hand man of a certain congressman, no wonder he had the gun (but still he didn't have to threaten me by pointing a firearm at me kahit opisyal sya!). From there, I was cornered and held by the two guys as I waited for my parents to come and negotiate. The talk ended within an hour or so; thankfully the Innova guy pardoned me for my age and inexperience and he even attempted to mitigate the situation by requesting the MMDA officer to tell the authorities that it was an accident. For that, we need only to pay for his medical expenses. Just when I thought that my driving days are over, the officer handed back my license and told me to never drive recklessly (one thing which I had always avoided). When things went stable a bit, my dad, accompanied by the two guys, went to the police station to have the car booked into their records and to settle the matter at hand. As a whole, this experience traumatized my entire being as a driver, and indeed, I had learnt plenty of lessons from this incident. After the talk, mom and I drove back home. I was so stunned to the point I can't barely speak a word; and perhaps because it was out of shame that I didn't have the energy to eat my meals for that day when I reached home. I pondered and reflected upon the crime I had done while the sky outside darkened as though a death just occurred.. true, a death of my own pride...

2006-07-08T23:40:00.000-07:00

Lying in a Bed of Thorns and Roses

Look who's blogging on a monthly basis, MOI! :P Anyway, here's a quick rewind of my experiences so far... School obviously began a month ago without much of any trouble at all, but as the weeks progressed, I started to feel uneasy about certain professors and their subjects. Although I had been able to optimistically orient myself regarding my new set of subjects; however, some persisted to haunt me in the dark recesses of my delicate and unstable mind. Minor subjects such as English, Phil Gov't, Philosophy and LIterature (even if the prof seems a bit sadistic in grading and takes everything by chance like a bingo game, which in fact he does :P ) are merely the gambits in this chessboard of second year life, wherein I currently possess the upper hand. Phy-Ana, despite its nature as a major subject, poses no threat whatsoever to my studies; in fact, I am enjoying this curriculum, just as much as the professor is enjoying my company (hopefully lolz!) in the class as I blurt out irrelevant yet trivial comments and questions that seem to stir up his train of thought on the lesson. Just when things are falling into place the way we have deemed them so, Organic chemistry became a cursed impediment in maintaining my DL status. The subject matter was more of a splinter, piercing deep into my skin than a caress on the cheek. Our first topic was the basic nomenclature of organic compounds, which was fairly easy to understand, and yet when we took the test, I merely got an exact passing mark of six out of ten! To think that I had taken up organic chemistry back in third year high school, getting such a low score was indubitably unacceptable and embarrassing! Perhaps fate had been puppeteering the class; noise level on one fine sunny day and activated bitch-mode on our professor, which started a chain of endless negative feedbacks and low quiz scores. The massacre of the innocents lasted for about two weeks wherein she gave out quizzes without even thoroughly discussing the lesson at hand, leaving the class to fend for itself. What the heck? What was the point of her doing this to us? The bottomline is, she has no absolute right to restrain herself from delivering the lesson to us because of a mere offense, I mean we pay her shit in order to diffuse shit into our brains! Sheesh, how disappointing to note that her action was really unprofessional to use her students as outlets of her own anger! That just sucks doesn't it? Fortunately in two weeks time, she cooled of from the incident and we sought this as an opportune moment to apologize to her, and so we did. In an instant, the wicked witch within her melted away and the old fairy godmother we once knew a few days past returned. Thank God she cancelled the quiz we had earlier and as for the report deadlines, she compassionately move them to a week from the day the experiment was performed. Basically, everything returned to normal..except the grades that is. :P I can indeed call it a week despite the hectic schedule I am experiencing lately. PE day indeed became a chilling spree for us when we went out to watch a movie after classes. Yes, we really made the most out of the day. hahaha! Zipidee doo dah, zipidee yey! My oh my what a wonderful day! lolz! As for today, I went to school again to audition for the Purple Gazette and attend the orientation for the Hatha Yoga club. Overall it is a very fulfilling day, I hope I was able to kick ass in the auditions, but anyway, the day itself ended with a pair of painful hands and also, a pair of interwoven souls... :) Ciao!

2006-06-06T11:20:00.000-07:00

The Summer's Symphony Coming to an End....

Whether we like it or not, summer is coming to a close yet again.. time flies doesn't it? Nearly two months have passed since my last entry; and who would believe that despite the many shortcomings that I've experienced in this span of two months, I would walk out once again to the realities of this God-forsaken world, contemplating on the possiblities that await me, and rekindling that sense of hopelessness as I venture further hence into the world. Yet all these thoughts and emotions will soon dissipate as expected, for time has granted me enough to see the graces that my life has to offer. True, my summer has been quite sedentary and monotonous from the beginning; however, I never stopped there; I went on in search of activities that which in its very simplicity could bring out the best in anyone.. in the early weeks of May, I went out often with my friends back in high school to play badminton. Although our planned agenda sometimes were in vain, we never gave up in persisting to meet up and gather for some quick games of Poona :P For once, we had engaged in something physically beneficial, rather than just sitting around in front of one's PC doing nothing on the net and playing games.. honestly my group is starting to dislike playing those games, nevertheless our old passion for that came back from time to time, but it never truly got the best of us.. in the words of Raffy: "Ayoko ko nang maglaro ng DotA, I wanna learn poetry and guitar!" Gosh, I really felt amazed at Raffy's sudden change of interest! From a mad scientist and computer genius to a well-versed epic poet and musician! Oh well, some of the finest things in life are truly the best alternatives. Hahaha! Go Raff! Finally, someone in my inner circle of High 4D has come to share a similar field. I am truly hoping that I'd get away from playing too much computer games, else it would consume me entirely.. oh God please help me... lead me not into this temptation, and deliver me from this evil that may disrupt my life and others'. Anyway, as for myself, I devoted my spare time in reading the compilation of the Vampire Chronicles. Suffice to say, the first three novels leaves the reader spellbound to the plot's intricacy as it furthers takes on more twist and turns until one realizes in the end that every detail presented amidst the detours of thought, partake essential roles in forming the very climax that had been building up since the first novel! One thing I realized after reading all three novels was that everything in this world, be it a mere mortal, spirit, or even a supernatural being such as an undead vampire, has a purpose to fulfill in the greater scheme of things. One thing is for certain, spirits are real. The magic and desire of renewing the face of the earth could only be accomplished simply by means of our human reason and spirit. No force outside, not even ghastly apparitions of the spirit realm could ever move or manipulate our wills to its bidding, for it is the grace in us all that pushes us to move towards the betterment of everything. Humans inherently incline themselves to means that would provide beneficial ends obviously; and it is in this sense that we acknowledge ourselves to be divine and human.. beings embodied with such preternatural gifts of reason and intellect that we walk the mortal plane for a task of rebuilding it. What are wars? I'd say they are merely the effects of those who do not see the power that resides in them.They had such reason and power to choose the gift of immortality, the strength and will to repress the burning hunger for blood and death.. vampires they may be, but such human qualities they possess! I think I better stop from this point, I'm starting to sound like a pastor already :P :P I guess it's up to the readers to interpret the message of the story, perhaps in the end we'll share a common perception of things.. hopefully. With the end of the trilogy, my summer hereby ends with lessons in mind. After all these, I realized how thrilling it is to live on with life and see what happens next.. although, yes, I've learned to take certain steps in a less drastic manner, to become more empathic as a whole as I was before. Never have I been so alive.. to be able to interact with my friends even more freely than before, to have decided on a path for my future, and to see my family reborn in happiness once more. Indeed, I felt true gratefulness for everything and everyone.. I wish to start anew and to heal wounds of the past.. well I guess that is it for now, God bless everyone and I hope all had a great summer.. good luck in school :)

2006-05-05T01:35:00.000-07:00

The Tragedy of the Shadowbird's Coven

From time to time, people scan along the words of a normal, optimistic youth within this blog. However, they are simply ignorant of the melancholic mystery that peeks behind the eyes of the smileys in each entry. The hour is indeed upon me to make known to the readers about some truths about his past. Like some tales that have evolved from the dreary chasms of history, the Shadowbird's is such abounded by sorrow, uncertainty, love and loss, despondency and most of all, hatred. To the person whom the Shadowbird once held so dear to his heart, he dedicates this to her... and now, the story unfolds...

The Shadowbird is also nicknamed the Dark Angel (as his friends might sometimes brand him) for his unwavering willingness to offer help when the need arises, and of his relentless and mischievous tomfoolery. Always spreading his jet black wings in the midst of his flight, he made sure that what he does is the right thing for himself and others. In his early years as a fledgling of his parents, he lived a life that he considered fulfilling, a kind of life bestowed that was more than what he could have asked for, given his age and time. Since then he could not deny that he effectively felt that he was cared for and loved by them. Once in a while had he enjoyed spending the warm summer Sunday mornings with his mother and father nesting atop the bay shore's rocky slopes before they went to visit his grandparents in the city; and how he had habitually delivered them a goodnight's kiss each night... Those were times when they all found genuine happiness among themselves, as a united coven of loving and compassionate members. Yet he sensed that the time will inevitably arrive when he would have to face an accursed fate, to depart on his own and walk on the Devil's Road.

With age comes wisdom and knowledge, and as it did to our Dark Angel. From his long sleep in the realm of innocence, he had finally awakened to the facts of life, including the ones with regard to his own family. From that time onwards, naivete has never been accepted as a valid excuse for not taking part in the coven's affairs any longer. He was put to the test and had to deal alongside with his parents the problems that are to befall them soon. It was made known to him that his grandmother was financially duping the entire coven, housing everyone to believe that she had the intended will from his grandfather, safe and intact for her sons and grandchildren. But who was she to fool them?? A close relative in a former British colony reported to the coven that she had built a house there for herself. Aside from the traumatic revelation, he eventually learned that his grandmother had been oppressing his mother when she moved in with his father, treating her like a rogue member of her new coven.. Almost every night she argued with her and cried her heart out to the young Dark Angel's father, expressing her pain and disbelief of such an attitude from a person like her. Enraged, his dad went to confront the latter's own mother and talked it out. But as expected, she was beyond hope and mercy from the Lord.. and at that moment, Dark Angel's mother stood resolved to move out anytime soon.. his dad in turn had chosen to follow her to the bitter end, yet things were only starting to get hasty.

Years passed and our little Dark Angel grew at mind and heart. As a young teenager at around 12 or 13, he developed his own sense of belonging with his friends but that did not hinder his bonds with the family. In the process he learned to love others even more, saw the good in every person and the grace of seeing the light in themselves, he learned to let bygones be bygones and to start anew. Moreover, he disliked physical and emotional violence.. it was one of the things he resented with all his heart and soul. Yes, he felt a certain calling bloom inside him, and that is to become an eternal and mortal servant of God, a priest. In the meantime, his parents, having been recovered out of that fateful experience back at his grandparents' house, his parents influenced him to become primarily cynical and steadfast in whatever endeavor (be it good or evil) he might engage himself into. In other words, the main message is: "Life is unfair, and it screws everyone.. so show no mercy!" To put it bluntly, it was like every man for himself. Fortunately for him, he never totally yielded to their teachings, he deemed it was somehow selfish of one to undertake such things. Mayroon siyang sariling paninindigan! Consequently, that influence diminished his fervent desire to become a priest..it was as though goodness was another idealistic concept for the world in his own perception, perfectly impossible to attain. Because of this, the Dark Angel himself opted to look into the dark corners of human thought, secrets begotten from the geniuses whose views of God were as insignificant as that of a neutrino's molecular mass. Furthermore, he couldn't shake the feeling that this little coven of his was drastically changing its orientation.. everyone emitted a sort of aura that was simply unpleasant.. the tables have turned when family matters became secondary and success was top priority. Come to think of it, who was to blame? Upon realizing all this, Dark Angel indeed felt like a former angel of God, casted beneath into the fiery maws of hell, damned for all eternity... patiently waiting for the time of salvation. Time progressed with his emotions growing more and more uncertain of what to truly feel for his family. Sympathy? What is there to be upset and concerned about when no one gives a s*** in the coven! At the very least, he found solace in his sister and friends; away from the disappointing attitude of their parents. All this time, he tried to make known his persisting love for his parents by conversing with them; yet, he felt the inadequacy of the feelings they had shown him before.. as if they appear like statuettes unwilling to listen to him.. Seeing that things are quite beyond his control, he let this pass, hoping that they'd soon be conscious of what they have become. Nevertheless, he had made a big mistake. For now, he preferred to share his love and concern to those around him, to those who would accept him as a person, and those he found deserving enough.

Perhaps if we rush into the recent past, things might go a bit easier and comfortable since the Shadowbird's mid-teens were too "dark" a memory...

The following years were much more turbulent as compared to his early years; our young Dark Angel became imbued with a talent for words.. words that gave luster and color to the world of the imaginative mind... words that could enkindle the heart of a lover...words which could bring history back to life...words that incited passion....and words... that somehow fell on deaf ears. So far the Dark Angel eventually got accustomed to his parents and had been able to move on; at the very least they had time to spend with their children, which didn't bother him at all. Perhaps it was safe for him to declare that the situation for him was... stabilizing? Or was it? Moving on, his dad, growing a bit frustrated with his business was flaring up so often at home for no reason at all. He often got angry at the family for the slightest mistakes and had several quarrels with Dark Angel's mother. His father also reproached his younger sibling's irresponsibilities with a flame of sadistic pleasure dancing in his eyes. Saddened by the undeniable event, he took matters into his own hands by wielding the only weapon available to him, words. Dark Angel tried addressing in a manner his own father never expected from him; he possessed a tone, comparable to that of an elderly wizard yet unequal in raw wisdom. He mustered everything in his power to turn his father back to the light, but to no avail, the attempt was futile.. his father continued to dwell in his own private hell. The situation was getting out of hand for his mother; thus, she saw no other option but to resort to the worst.. however, at the stroke of luck, the young angel's father averted from his ways and changed for the better... but alas, he was too late. The Dark Angel's mother became too close a friend of her husband's old confidante, and sooner or later, they kept in touch to the point where there was simply too much intimacy involved between them. Despite all her efforts to cover up their connection, the dad was able to discover the truth. In the first place, why didn't she just reconcile with him and get things back into place once more? Well, I guess it will persist to be one of the greatest mysteries that this world has ever sired... (Part two will be coming soon.. abangan!)

2006-04-19T01:05:00.000-07:00

I'LL BE AROUND
by: The Spinners

This, is our fork in the road
Love's last episode
There's nowhere to go, oh no
You made your choice, now it's up to me
To bow out gracefully
Though you hold the key, but baby

(CHORUS)
Whenever you call me, I'll be there
Whenever you want me, I'll be there
Whenever you need me, I'll be there
I'll be around...yeah

I, knew just what to say
Now I found out today
That all the words had slipped away, but I know
There's always a chance
A tiny spark remains, yeah
And sparks turn into flames
And love can burn once again, but I know you know (Chorus)

(Bridge)
Just call me at home, I'll be there
I'll never leave you alone, I'll be there
Just call out your name you know I know you know
I'll be around.

Be strong and never lose hope in yourself.. I am really grateful for everything and I shall uphold my promise to you :(... God bless and remember that my prayers will be with you always.. 5 WORDS and.... adieu.

2006-04-11T16:10:00.000-07:00

Nearing Emotional Suicide...

Let us get one thing straight here first, whatever it is that I may write down and may sound or appear open-ended, do not bother to ask me why because it might incur more freaking damage to my troubled heart and mind. I wanna keep it confidential, so bear with it. Here I go...

Yesterday was the tenth of April, and it was the day when we were supposed to get our clearance in school. I had to wake up early so as to meet up with the schedule allotted for my class. So there, I drove off around 7am in the morning and fortunately I did not bump into any sort of traffic and stuff kaya nakarating ako nang maaga sa UST and found a comfortable parking spot. Since it was still early, I stayed inside the car reading my book and took a short nap until Hya texted me that they are up in the lab and waiting for me; hence, I took my stuff and went all the way to the laboratory level (Lab15 to be precise). Upon reaching the laboratory, I was greeted with warm smiles from my classmates after months of isolation and boredom. After getting the essential documents from the teacher, I turned my focus onto Hya and talked immediately about her experiences with Harry Potter. Just then Monica arrived with the same business as ours but with an extra load from Harris and JJ. Aside from that she asked us to go with her and consult our trigonometry prof, Mr. Baes about Nic's incomplete status. So we waited outside and discussed particularly about HP and many other things under the sun. In the middle of the laughtrip, Hya and I decided to go for a little walk and soon we went to my car and stayed there for a talk... since it was Clearance Day, I made a few things clear already to her... all I can say is that the talk was very emotional. From there, we decided to go out together and spend some quality time once more..we've been dreadfully missing each other, but there already exists a thorn stuck in our hearts after what happened in the conversation inside the car. Overall, we enjoyed the day naman, masaya so far.. as I mentioned a while ago, I will not entertain questions as of now. Goodbye and good luck in inferring.. God Bless you all.

2006-04-08T13:50:00.000-07:00

Immortality: Eternal Happiness or Damnation?

Staying at home and doing nothing never proved to be productive as running naked around your neighborhood, nor was it any more exciting than watching a snail slowly move along its substrate and leaving behind a trail of slime in National Geographic. From time to time I would brainstorm on several possible activities that I might immerse myself into, such as badminton; yet, all attempts to schedule for a few games with my high school buddies proved futile in the end.. perhaps another time, hopefully. In the midst of boredom and the growing anxiety of becoming mentally incapacitated, my desire to read and to allow my mind to transcend the boundaries of imagination and reality hit me like a speeding bullet once again. Besides, it was next best thing to do, secondary to physical activities and surfing the net. Before going on, I want to clarify something about myself...

Human nature in its very heart could be expressed in certain ways one would never expect. Since the awakening of my inquisitive mind, I have harbored this longing to delve into the world of the supernatural; dwelling in the presence of their grisly and macabre regime. On my part, I couldn't even comprehend the reason for my peculiar interest in such, but something rings in the back of my mind and tells me that nothing which exists in this world is hardly what it seems. Sometimes I even wonder whether or not this willingness of mine is still a part of my so-called "human nature". Come to think of it, yes, but in a strange sort of way. Because of this renewed interest in me had been stirred up for the summer, I decided to look over my library of horror novels.

While scanning through, my eyes suddenly found themselves locked unto one book. It's a novel by Anne Rice entitled Blood and Gold, which is a volume of the popular Vampire Chronicles. As I held it, I immediately remembered that I had not been able to entirely finish the book in my second year back in high school because of a certain computer project, damn. I bet my cousin's dying to get it back from me, and check out the old Garfield bookmark: it was still caught between pages 50 and 51! Hehehe! Oh well, at least I had the ample time to finish the rest of the story..in peace; finally after 3 years can now return to its true owner. Anyway, I have always loved Anne Rice's novels for the simple reason that she somehow fully understands and reaches deep within the human psyche and imbuing such features and expression into her original undead characters; thus, making them very much "alive" in that sense. Treading through the pages, I got the chance to get a glimpse of the ancient world in the eyes of a vampire; marveling at the richness and variety of the arts and cultures that abound him throughout the centuries; skulking the city streets at night just to sate the burning hunger for blood; and bearing the gift of everlasting life. Reading on, I thought of the possibilities of achieving immortality and reflected on it. Imagine existing through time and space infinitely until the end of the world, enabled to behold all the wonder and beauty that surrounds us, learning everything that one can fathom to the point that feels he or she can even supersede God Himself...... but to what end? We might experience gratification and fulfillment for a certain span of time and dissipates soon before we know it, however, we yearn for something more, something higher.. the insatiable desire eventually leads to another search and goes on without end until we realize that everything seems so empty- as though there is no God and that one is damned for eternity. Likewise, one enjoys immortality at a very expensive price where one gets to live forever and goes through life seeing other people suffer and succumb to the reaper of Death itself. What could be worse than sharing this "gift" to another person in this context and thus, inviting him or her to undergo the same realization of endless and pointless living. A blessing or a curse? Why not try it yourselves? Hahaha!

2006-03-31T02:30:00.000-08:00

Boredom Kills...

Just like the days before it, this freaking day is downright boring but of course I have to consider some of its consolations. :D

With each passing minute, I was getting quite desperate for something to do out of sheer boredom, I urged Raffy and the others (such as Nichel, Bobby and Cons) to engage in a physical activities like badminton! Raffy obviously agreed without hesitation due to the fact that he promised to himself that he will abstain from computer games since it has been like an eternity for him to have spent a life as someone very computer-oriented, it was time for him to turn over a new leaf. :)

So there, we were able to plan out everything from the venue to the scheduled time of meeting and preparation. I went to Bob's house at around 10am with Raffy catching up ten minutes later.The only guy left to wait for was Nichel, but an hour or so had passed before he arrived.so we felt quite contrained in badminton time since Bob and Raffy had to attend a lecture for their driving course.. a total waste of time? Well not really, haha! At the very least we had a sort of bonding session in Bob's private room. It was very worthwhile and not to mention, funny to the highest level. hahaha! Anywayz, I guess that wraps up the day for me :P Till next time guys! God bless!

2006-03-30T11:25:00.000-08:00

Weirder by the Moment...

Summer vacation has begun but I just don't see point of having a little retreat while you're merely bumming around at home doing absolutely nothing productive. At the very least, I tried to find some time to continue reading one of my left-out books. hahaha! Strangely enough, I found out that Jesus actually had a twin brother, whom He had shared his messiahship with; and Judas was actually compelled by Jesus to act against his own will, which was to betray his own master for the sake of fulfilling the prophecies of the Old Testament. Hahahaha! :P :P Anyway, that was all I did for yesterday, well, not entirely since I spent most of my time texting just to let time pass by in the hope that everything would be secure for an intimate conversation; however, of course, I had some time with my family at nightfall... we ate outside for my dad's birthday.. Happy Birthday, dad! So there, inabutan kami hanggang 9:30pm siguro just to finish our dinner since medyo na-delay ung order namin. hahahaha! While we were enjoying our meals, something quite unexpected had happened. An American lady who was walking past our table heading for the restrooms suddenly felt like slipping; good for her she didn't fall down, but afterwards she was alright and went on with her business. The weird thing is, both my sister and I had this strong feeling that the lady would slip! My sister even told me that she heard my voice in her head whispering of the incident that took place. Psychic phenomenon? Or was it merely a coincidence? hahaha! We'll never know, but it was so real to be false... So there we have it..we can call it a day perhaps? See you all!

2006-03-27T22:15:00.000-08:00

Another Day in Paradise

At long last, summer vacation is here! Finally I could rest and sleep all day to my liking without any worries at the back of my mind! Yahoo!!! Yes, school is over.. and that boils down to only one thing... we're basically gonna spend the majority of our days, stuck in our homes doing nothing. Although we may come up with something worthwhile to keep ourselves busy, we tend to repeat the same cycle of the previous day over and over again on the next; thus, resulting in a monotonous rerun of yesterday! So parang walang nangyari, hahahhaha! Shet! Paano na ito?! I gotta think of something interesting to do or rot to death under the heat of the sun.. huhuhuhu! I assume it's still too early to decide for that so I'm focusing more at the present, what the hell am I gonna get myself into in the meantime? hahaha!

Before losing myself in the heat of summer, my classmates and I decided to check out our grades so as to alleviate our persistent burden of worrying about failing or passing the subjects. Kaya for today, peeps of mine who were dying to know their grades infiltrated the faculty workroom and sought for our profs in charge. hahaha! Buti nalang matataas ung mga nakuha namin. It was indeed a moment of celebration for the most of us because we were able to pass them with flyin' colors; yet, some have failed and are required to take either the summer classes or choose to become irregular students in the following school year... a tough choice, but such have to be accomplished in order to move on.. Hayy.. some inevitable events in life.. :( Ayan, after becoming aware of our current academic statuses, we parted and hoped for a better year in the next. As for Hya and I, the day wasn't over yet for the both of us. :D

Two hours after worrying about our final grades in chemistry and math (although ayaw ipakita sa amin ni Sir Baes), Hya and I talked about going on a little date. Both of us agreed to have some time together to enjoy and talk things out a bit, so we opted to head all the way to Robinsons Galleria para manuod ng movie! Masaya naman yung taxi ride, naglokohan kami about sa mga ID pics namin, WAHAHAHAHA! 70s look! Yeah! :P And of course, how could we forget that pose we took :) :) *winks* Arriving at Galleria, we headed for the cinema level and decided to watch "She's the Man!". Hahaha! Just what we needed after weeks of mind-deteriorating lessons, a very good laughtrip! Grabe talaga nakakatawa siya, as in! I have to admit, gumagaling na si Amanda Bynes sa career nya :P hahaha! pangit kasi impression ko sa kanya noon eh :P wala lang! wakoko! Ayokong maging spoiler, kaya panoorin nyo nlng sya. Lol! :D After the movie, Hya and I had lunch in Chef de Angelo where we had our usual order of pasta hahaha! So there, a millennium later, we headed to Starbucks to chill out and have a little chat of our own. It is in this very coffee shop where we had our most emotional and tearjerking conversation. I dare not share the reason for our melancholic disposition then, but I can assure the readers of this entry with one thing, firm promises have been made and hearts have been purged of deep feelings of sadness. It was then that I realized how ironic life's events could sometimes be. They may seem so impeccable; yet in the end, it would simply dissipate like a cloud of gas. With each passing, we have grown to love each other more, and as a matter of fact we seem inseparable.True! So true!Unfortunately for us, things indeed will have to take their course someday.. OH I DEFY YOU STARS!!!! :(( With that, the day ended for the both of us pleasantly so far.. we parted with smiles and winks as the sun set. Call it a day then.. God Bless everybody.

2006-03-18T23:40:00.000-08:00

In the Footsteps of Dante Alighieri...

Greetings once again... how many weeks has it been since my last entry. Well, it doesn't matter anyway. Backtracking, everything that had happened last month was stable as usual, my life wasn't much of a hell as compared to what I am experiencing as of now. Despondently speaking, I could say that I am immersed in a shitload of unfortunate events, sufficient enough to stir up a suicidal intent inside me. Kidding aside, I am recently going through a lot of stress and agony... yes, AGONY! With the Final grading period coming close to an end and summer approaching fast, everybody's cramming like there's no tomorrow! Talk about restless nights of pure uninterrupted study and research! Like corpses, we marched into our classes with malfunctioning brain cells and drooping eyelids. The days that followed seemed like a waste of my efforts in studying for quizzes and practical exams. Why? Obviously, I cannot concentrate well enough, kaya walang pumapasok sa utak ko! Sobrang lousy ang pakiramdam ko after every test, feeling babagsak talaga eh. Oh crap, I gotta make up for my sleep, or else I'll continue to experience a decline in both memory function and...in my sanity. :( Gosh I am totally pissed with my overall performance this week.. the mind and body are both unwilling! Huhuhuhuhu!!!!

For this week, I have gone through heaven, purgatory and hell. I prefer not to expound on the details, so please bear with it. Oh how the world turns against me...for every pinch of happiness, it trails off to become a ton of gloom and melancholy. God, things were stable before...ok naman ang pakikitungo ko with my friends then, but mother dearest had to intervene in my affairs to the point that she made me feel hopeless and alone all of a sudden. Since I was a little boy, I often thought to myself and probed for an answer as to why my mom is really this zealous when it comes to picking a fight or getting angry. I guess I will never know the reason why, only God is knowledgeable for her condition about this... kung ganito talaga siya, wala akong magawa kundi tanggapin nalang ang kanyang ugali, but I know deep inside her she is simply trying her best in helping out her own son.. something that kindles both my gratitude and apprehension towards her. Strange isn't it? Presently, mom is getting much of the spotlight between Hya and I. Well, it all started with just an innocent text from Hya, nagkukumusta lang and I guess because of the impulsive resentment we shared for my mom, she mentioned the codename, Motherwitch. It became habitual for us to call her as such kaya nasali sa text nya yun. Unfortunately for us, my mom snooped into my room and got hold of my phone and saw Hya's message... what followed afterwards was not disastrous at all, but I can see that she shot dagger looks at me... Without another word, she did not hesitate to text Hya! Kinabahan talaga ako at akala ko mumurahin na nya si Hya pero to my relief she simply asked "Wat do u want?" But it does not remove the fact that my mom actually took the first shot. Shucks I really cannot take this anymore! Wala na akong privacy! Can't they see that I am working this out?!?! Jess please help me... nahihiya nga ako sa gnawa ng mom ko eh... Sheesh, I could only think about putting away that event for a while and study first; yet, it persists and knocks on my head until now. Shit, I feel so disgusted of myself..what kind of a son am I to have branded my mom with a derogatory name! What was I thinking?! I reckon I'd better have a little heart-to-heart talk with my mom and set things right. Just hope that it will turn out well tomorrow.. and my sincere apologies to Hya, Mon and most of all, my mom... God bless you all and good luck for the remaining week... I AM TRULY SORRY... :((

2006-02-17T17:30:00.000-08:00

God is Playing Dice with Me

After a hectic week of examinations and requirements (especially the Theo MTV), we somewhat retired from our workload a bit and took time in putting ourselves back together in preparation for the wave of stressful weeks. During this week, not much was expected from us or the professors since we are merely going to get back our exam papers and recheck everything. To my surprise, I was able to score with flying colors in Chem Lec, Psychology and Filipino! Whoa! Feeling lucky I guess?? :P hahahaha! Monday has been a very pleasant day for us all because it was Valentine's Day! For this very special day of hearts, I bought my princess a little surprise (hope she liked it :D) and of course a nice package that held a chocolate rose, a cute little bear and a letter that included a poem :D hahaha! Nothing beats literature and poetry in shedding some light and warmth into other people's hearts! :) To reciprocate for what I've given, she in turn had something for me as well, a ring! I was indeed touched by that simple gesture of kindness and love...it was then that I became aware of the fact that I have been too engrossed with my school work to the point that I forgot to put a little more effort in expressing myself more to her about how I feel... yet I will not let it end there.. it's about time that I call forth my talents and learn to become who I am meant to be.

Everything was sailing smoothly for me and my classmates until the time came when our most beloved and caring Ma'am Mendoza announced that the defense for our research paper will take place next week on Tuesday, and it'll be starting off with the first 10 students handpicked, literally, with the undeniable divine guidance of God... WOW ma'am you are such as a demigod! Omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent! :P Upon hearing that she'll be selecting those strips of paper with the biggest fold, I started to get a little jittery. And yes, I was a very lucky guy to have been chosen to be the 4th guy to defend...NOT! Mahal talaga ako ni Lord, top 10 palagi! :P Top 10 sa DL, top 10 din sa order ng defense, hahaha! jk lng! ang yabang ko noh? hahaha! Well, at least after the defense, be it a successful or futile performance, the fact remains that I will have been able to considerably lighten my workload. On the days that followed, our assignments begin to pile up once more and I can feel the pressure again. There was not a day this week when I was able to sleep properly due to the many requirements that this week demands of me.In preparation for my English process, I decided to come up with my all-time "favorite" project back in my high school days, making a Chinese lantern. Though the work of coming up with one was really tedious and boring, I tried to finish it off in one night with a dose of patience.. Once I had been able to accomplish it, I dropped dead on my bed immediately with no other plans in mind. hahaha! Why does everything have to occur all so suddenly? Such a perfect fit at such an imperfect timing.. But I shall try to remain steadfast despite all these. Nothing will stand in my way this time.. as of now, a song lingers in my mind...."We shall overcome, we shall overcome someday..." :D :D Oh Jess, I am truly sorry for breaking my promise so often. Please welcome me back to thy fold... my brother, please forgive me that I may see the light of your undying love and loyalty...

2006-01-30T23:53:00.000-08:00

Nervous Breakdown Imminent....

'Tis been a long time since I had written my last blog, but does it look like I have a choice? This week made our freakin' brains work to the limit, skying the limit, aren't we? YES! Gosh, I can't think well anymore!!! Someone give me a lobotomy!!!! :P

Since our preliminary examinations are drawing near, the profs have been trying to allocate their schedules and activities into this week in order to lighten the load when exam week arrives. Unfortunately for us, we are all subjected to an endless bombardment of assignments, quizzes, practical exams, experiments, thesis paper. For this week alone, we were able to sleep for approximately 4-5 hours only per day due to the busy schedule, kaya pagpasok sa klase, sabaw ang mga utak! :P Well what can I say? There is simply no turning back, everything has been set, the die is cast. and its all on us... As for me, I believe that I can manage it myself even if things get even more hectic, because of the plain reason that I am motivated to stand up and recover from a fairly poor beginning this semester.

At least for tonight I am able to accomplish my thesis paper in Filipino, the most important and life-dependent subject of them all! What the heck?? I'd rather make a paper for MT instead, or even Psychology! Kahit ganun kakupal paminsan si Ma'am Mendoza, I cannot deny the fact that she is actually helping in paving a way in developing further our skills in writing and researching in preparation for our third year. Thanks, but no thanks ma'am....dahil inaantok na kami! Amen this!!!! ,.l.. Whoops, sorry... Shucks, I'm getting the feeling that there are more things to come this week; yet, I feel ready for them, bring it on! Tapusin niyo na ako!!!! hahaha! Jk! God Bless everyone and take care 1G, good luck this week and think positive always! Love y'all!

2006-01-08T12:00:00.000-08:00

Going back to Reality

Sunday, the day of rest, or is it? With the Christmas vacation way out of our minds, the time has come for us all to get back to school work. Consequently, our professors configured themselves to return to their no-mercy mode/routine and thus, they bombarded us with activities, experiments and quizzes as soon as we went back. This week came to an end with a huge workload behind our backs, especially in Botany, Chemistry and of course, Filipino, the most important subject of them all! :P For today, I simply worked on my assignments on Chemistry, studied for Botany and worked a little bit on my research paper for Filipino. We were given the task of completing experiment 6 on our chemistry lab manuals; however, I found out that it was not as easy as I had it on my mind... although there lies a summary at the appendix, still it proved quite useless for some items., talk about wasting 20 mins just to search for the answer to three items. :P Running out of functioning brain cells, I sought Popoy's help in answering.. moments later he also became stuck in some items and couldn't go on.. napagod na rin :P We decided we'd just study other subjects than to waste time in this ordeal.. and it's off to Botany and Experiment 4! I guess that's it for today, good luck to all and God Bless everyone! Tnx pala Popoy! :) hahaha!

2005-12-29T01:26:00.000-08:00

The Return of the Lester

Another day with new possibilities has come once again. For today, my high school friends and I planned to go to SM Megamall for a little welcome-back gimik with Lester, who has been studying in the States and is here for his Christmas break. Surprisingly, only the five of us (Me, Lester, Raymond, Cons and NIchel) agreed to partake in this! Kasi naman, may issue between Lester, Raffy, Bob and Kenneth eh :( , I just hope that they'd stop their petty ridiculing and apologize to each other for crying out loud! God! I'm really so fed up with their ego triping..Anywayz, it was in the morning when I decided to wait for Lester to come to my house and pick me up. It was quite late then, mga 11:00 na siguro nun tsaka siya dumating. From there, we headed all the way to the Acropolis in Libis to pick up Raymond; and soon, we transferred to Raymond's car and he drove all three of us to SM.

Getting a little impatient by the minute, Cons persistently called us up and was asking if we were near yet. Fortunately for him, we were on the parking lot already. Hahaha! :P Upon arrival, I got my heavy bowling bag out from the compartment and headed to the bowling alley with Mondy and Lester. As we reached the front door, it was compulsory for the guards to inspect our bags, and as were going through, some guys looked at my bowling bag as though I had hidden a 20 megaton nuke in it! Ayun, tapos humirit pa si Lester na terrorist daw ako, kaya medyo nahihiya nga ako then eh :P Pero ok lang, got a few laughs and all that! Hahaha! After that we hurried to the bowling alley and to our surprise, Cons was the only guy there waiting...NIchel has not yet arrived then. Wasting no time at all, we left our bowling stuff in the counter and headed off to the mall to have our lunch in the fastfood. An hour later, we returned to the bowling alley to start off even without Nichel, since he's coming a little later, we might as well begin by ourselves.. so Cons, Raymond, Lester, I played on. It has been almost a month already since I rolled by ball down the lanes.. haha! What a good time to practice :P Moments later, Nichel came with the usual gangster-like smile and the pimpled face. :P Two hours have passed, kaya napapagod na rin kami so we stopped. Still yearning for some fun, Lester suggested that we shoot pool, so nakisama nalang ako sa kanila kahit ako naglaro. As I was scanning through the place, I caught sight of Jeerah! She was with her barkada then, nagbobowling din sila of course. All of a sudden I remembered poor heartbroken Fitz, moping about in his room thinking about his failed relationship with Jeerah :( So yun, eventually I was getting a bit bored kaya sumali na rin ako sa billiard game ng mga friends ko :P hahaha! Sometime later, we parted, said our Happy New Years and goodbyes, and I followed Nichel to his car para mahatid nya ako pauwi. Well, I guess that wraps up the day..nothing else happened today except for those, hehehe! But still, of course, I am trying my best to make this vacation as productive as possible for me. :P Grabe I'm missing High 4-D na talaga..oh, the Arctic wasteland where a biological warfare occurs every single day! hahaha! Anyways, God bless peeps! Take care and happy new year to all! :) Ingat lng pabalik sa US, Lester!

2005-12-25T20:40:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas! Maligayang Pasko! Sheng Tan Kwai Le!

The day that everybody has been waiting for has finally come! Yes! It's Christmas! Not much happened today except that my family and I went to my tita's house for a gathering that lasted about four hours! Hahaha! At least nakita ko ulit mga cousins ko and my other relatives I have not seen for quite some time. :D

Still, I just don't feel the same about Christmas anymore; hindi kagaya noon as in every Christmas, maraming inaasahang outings, gimik with friends, etc., pero ngayon, as if it's only October or November.. I would simply put it this way, my Christmas is one that is gloomy and boring.. in other words, hindi ko feel ang Christmas.. :( Hayy... and now I am really missing someone.. Christmas just ain't the same without my friends, especially her...at least we keep in touch for the holidays. :) I just hope that she's enjoying her timeout with her family as much as I am, kahit medyo malungkot lang nga ang pakiramdam ko... haha! Ciao guys! I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! May you all be blessed with joy and happiness in your hearts this season of hope. Take care of yourselves! Bye bye!

2005-12-20T12:55:00.000-08:00

Paskuhan 2005 (Oh Blessed, Blessed Night!)

By all the stars in heaven, today has been the most emotional and memorable day of my entire existence as a normal (and sometimes abnormal :P) human being..Why? Well, it is our last day together before we head off for our Christmas vacation; thus, it was expected that some of us would not part without first, giving their friends a good hug and sheding some tears. Secondly, we took the initiative to make our last day more exciting and enjoyable by planning an exchange gift amongst ourselves; also, we had a little party where many of us volunteered to bring food and drinks; unfortunately, many of us weren't able to make it to the gathering.. Despite that, I had been hoping that they'd make it to the much awaited Paskuhan that was held in the main field a while ago.Lastly, uhm...the Paskuhan tonight was a blast! And indeed, an experience I will cherish for the rest of my life... *period* :P :P

As I entered the classroom, I was greeted by the sight of my classmates handing out gifts to each other.. For once in 4-5 months, I felt proud and happy for my class that has grown into a family that has learned to love and accept its members for who they are. Gosh I feel like a father to my beloved section; they are my sons and daughters, who have earned my respect and love for all of them. Naks! Anywayz, at that moment, I joined the fun as well as I offered them my own gifts. Two to three hours later, the party began as soon as the food and drinks have arrived... Nagenjoy naman ang class, maraming kinain as usual mga iba dyan :P , may sumayaw, may natulog, and of course a few wanted a little privacy soo... they found a nearby door that was slightly ajar and they entered the empty room which eventually led them to Narnia... (waaa??) Minutes later, Ryan commenced the exchanging of gifts. It was indeed surprising to finally know who picked you, so I watched attentively and in the process, I was feeling kind of mushy all over by some pairs such as Radha and Meliton. Yihee! hahaha! Sayang hindi ko nabunot si Hya, pero ok lng.. haha! In the end, I am the only person left with a gift to exchange...too bad Marie wasn't there.. God! Pinaghirapan ko yng gift wrapping tpos hindi pa sya pmnta :( Huhuhu! Well, that's ok, I can give it to her on January na lang!

Anywayz, the party had to end soon therefore we cleaned up the place and busted outta there with so many plans in mind..well as usual, I had to say my adieus and goodbyes to Hya and the family first cuz I was going with Fitz and the other guys for a quick game :P

Whoa! some quick game we had.. 2-3 hours of play and our eyes are wanting to pop out of their sockets! :p Grabe all the while we thought that it was still bright and sunny outside, pero madilim na pala! Wahehehe! So pmnta na kming tatlo ni Jay at Fitz sa open field to meet Popoy and Hya. Took us quite a while though because it was dark and all that, parang you get the feeling that some cracked up psycho's gonna scare you from behind or something like that :P Good thing I was able to call up Hya, and from there, nagkita na kami and off we go to our place in the field with Popoy and Hazel waiting for us to arrive..ayun, naghintay nalang ako kasi may mass, at hindi ako nagattend from d beginning. haha! Soon afterwards, the Paskuhan began with a stupefying fireworks display! Grabe ang ganda ng colors and patterns nila! Sabi nga ni Popoy, at least we know kng saan pumupnta pera ntn, sa fireworks daw, and it was one Peso for each spark! Hahaha! Loko tlaga si popoy! :P Tapos, we went to fall in line in the food concessionaires for our dinner; however, the queue to each stand was as long as a line of desperate immigrants! Nagpapanic na nga si Hya eh, ayan nagregret tuloy ako, dapat hndi nalang ako naglaro nang matagal, sa ganun makakapila pa kami. Huhuhu! Moments later, nakahanap na rin kmi ng shorter line sa McDo, and yun, chow time na! haha! After dinner, we watched and listened to some groups perform; yet eventually some of us got a bit bored, including Hya and I, so we took a stroll on the illuminated walkways in front of the main building. Just when we were hoping for a "reserved" seat for two, biglang nakita namin ang daming tao sa Lovers' Lane, mukhang nagcamping na nga sila dyan eh! hahaha! The both of us had no choice but to go somewhere else, and while walking along, we came across Jeerah (Fitz'paramour) with another guy..boy, was Hya willing to tell Fitz about the shocking...truth? Ayun, so Hya and I went off onto our own wonderland in Colayco Park's "pond" and the Botanical Garden's new "lover's lane" (Grbe, may isang couple nakita naming nagsmsmooch sa isang sulok!), while the rest of the guys watched the performances of UST's very own nightingales and ballerinas (weh??) haha! For the next two to three hours, we spent some quality time together, poured our hearts out and shared our thoughts to each other.. well, it's our last meeting before the vacation begins, so we gotta make the most out of it! Ay me! I swear that everything that had taken place this evening will constantly reverberate through the halls of my heart and mind... and it was on this very night that I found my new addiction...

As Shakespeare hath quothed: "Oh trespass sweetly urged, give me my sin again!"

As the music from the field slowly faded away to the darkness of the night, we knew that it was time for us to pick up our stuff from our spot and of course, say our last goodbyes... since medyo late pa susunduin si Hya, sinamahan ko rin sya sa field with Grace.. but before that, we met up with Fitz and his friend on the way, and guess what, Hya and I blew it on his face! We told him what we saw a while ago about Jeerah with another guy...so there, at first he thought it was a joke, nevertheless, he had to believe the sad fact soon. Nako, nakakatawa talaga si Fitz sa pagddrama nya, hahaha! [Fitz: "Ang ganda na sana ng gabing ito, pero, YOU BROKE MY HEAAAAART... :(( Sayang talaga ang gift ko syo, PAK U!"] HAHAHA! Certified comedian and dramatist na si Fitz; however, deep inside his heart, weeps a dejected soul. Sa totoo lang, naaawa ako kay Pichoy...such a kind guy, ang bait2, took his time and effort to win the heart of a lady; and just when everything turned out right for Fitz, bgla lng syang na-lowblow.. :( Kasalanan ba namin ni Hya? Nah, the truth shall prevail!(Star??) Yes, the truth hurts like hell, but in the end we benefit from it; we recover and start anew. We will never allow our friend to live a life of lies, especially when it comes to love.I really think that a guy like Fitz deserves someone who is faithful and downright loving. Hayy..life's like that but when there's a will, there's also a way! From there, Fitz departed for King's apartment with a shattered pumping organ (??). As for Hya, Grace and I, we parted without any last words; just plain goodbyes and winks to wrap it all up... Grace was going home together with Hya so they waited in the hospital, while I left the both of them with a somewhat melancholic heart... Adieu, Merry Christmas to all, enjoy your break and sleep well. God Bless! :D

2005-12-18T19:51:00.000-08:00

Becoming Santa Claus....

Due to yesterday's "palpak-cated" shopping spree, I decided to go on another round in Greenhills this time with my dad and sister in search of gifts for my classmates. So, maaga ako nagising nung umaga, I think it was around 7 am then (excited sbra?) Hahaha! After eating breakfast with the family, my mom immediately went to open her store, while dad and I started up the car, minutes later my sister followed us into the vehicle and soon we were on our way to Greenhills again. Moments later, we were once more among the crowd of buyers sprawling about the narrow eskinitas of the tiangge areas. It was still early then so not all stores have been opened for service.. kaya, naglakad na lang kmi for one hour. Again, I decided to go to Bench to look for a "suitable" present for the guys, and yes, nahanap ko na rin! I bought six assorted towels for Harris, NIc, JJ, King, Jeremy and Popoy! :P Once done with our business, we drove off to church in order to attend Mass.

In the afternoon, we had the usual practice for the cotillion in my friend's debut. I for one feel very excited because it was our last practice for the year and my friend (the debutante) is inviting all members of the cotillion for a dinner, and its on her! We ate at Alex III and grabe, ang ingay naming lahat! Considering na maganda ang ambiance ng restaurant, tahimik pa, tpos biglang susulpot nalang kami sa loob (20 kami all in all) at maglolokohan nang todo! Hahaha! I enjoyed dinner with those guys; sobrang palabiro mga ksama ko roon! Sira ulo to the highest level! hahaha! What made this night meaningful was that we were able to have a sort of bonding session, just like any sorority or barkada! :P After the gathering, my sister and I went home with around 6-7 new YM IDs in my cellphone. :P Basically yun lng and I can call it a day so far! Well, see you all and have a Merry Christmas! Looking forward to meet new friends in the near future! God bless all of us!

2005-12-17T21:25:00.000-08:00

The Curse of the Christmas Gifts

The weekend is finally here! With the assignments and examinations done, all that's left for me to do is to go on a shopping spree for Christmas gifts..hahaha!

Before going to Greenhills, I made a checklist of those I plan to give presents to and with that accomplished afterwards, my mom dropped my sister and I at the shopping complex... from there, we're off in search of good stuffs to buy. As usual, the nearby tiangge eskinitas were very crowded with eager customers but not even they could hinder the both of us from seeking out the right gifts for our friends. So we went on and on for 30 minutes, yet nothing I saw there proved suitable for the guys... so, I thought of giving them something simple and practical...pmnta ako sa Bench to buy them handkerchiefs, for the 6 of my closest pals... :D Eventually, tumawag mom ko sa akin n asked kng ano binili ko for them, tpos cnabi ko panyo. Ayun, nothing significant happened afterwards, pero nung sinundo kaming dalawa tpos nasa kotse na kmi with mom, the real sermon began.. she tells us that handkerchiefs, umbrellas, shoes, socks were unfavorable gifts for Christmas because they symbolize parting and goodbyes. Here, she emphasized it did not necessarily apply to friendships that would soon deteriorate, but a death that will come for either the giver or recipient. At first I thought that my mom was becoming too superstitious again, but when I heard about the true story about my lolo's friend ending up dead because of a mere present, I started to have second thoughts. The goes story goes like this: My lolo had an officemate and he was his best friend during work. For Christmas, he went abroad, tpos binigyan nya si lolo ng payong bilang pasalubong.. the creepy part was when a week or two passed, someone called up on angkong's (lolo in Chinese) house informing him about the demise of his officemate who was robbed and stabbed... I was quite skeptical at first so I argued with mom that such things are so untrue, I mean there is no scientific proof that whenever a person is given such gifts, the one who bestowed the gift is destined for an unfortunate future or something like that... Fact or fiction, I could only say this, the spirit of Christmas must live on.. we could only put our faith in God alone, not in superstitious beliefs... it is our love for our friends where the essence of the gift lies; and mom, quit this bullshit now! Anyways, Merry Christmas one and all! :)

P.S. : Mom, hope you change for the better and may you become more optimistic with life...be happy.. Although life may seem like shit sometimes, still, God's intention for our existence here on earth is to enjoy life and to bask in its beauty... adieu....

2005-12-15T22:30:00.000-08:00

Holding on a Little Longer...

One final push, and it's all over, is it? Today was just like every other Tuesday or Thursday, except that we had our Chem lec examination from 12nn-1pm. When I awoke this morning, one thing came into my mind like a flash of lightning, an examination on chemistry and psychology awaits my class later on. So I hurried to prepare for departure, but to no avail, I was delayed due to an important phone call made by my aunt to my mom... sobra akong nagpanic kasi may test sa first period, tapos late pa ako! As my car reached Espana, it was around 6:50am then and as time progressed further without any movement in the traffic jam, I started to get nervous.. butterflies flyin' in my stoamach?!?! haha! But thank God, Monica texted me that Ma'am Doria is not in yet and that many others have yet to reach the classroom because of moderate traffic due to the bad weather. Whew! What a relief!

Upon arriving at UST, I rushed to my classroom, and to my surprise they were only reviewing the topics... mamayang 12nn pa raw yng test! Hay salamat!

With Psych coming up, I crossed my fingers hoping that there won't be any exams scheduled for the class, and when it was time, good old sister announced that there was none! Thank God! After which, we had theology then the exam for Chem lec... overall it was easy (yabang! :P), but what made me feel uncertain about my answers was when I reached the Redox portion.. it was somewhat confusing and... bah, I'd rather not talk about it anymore... basically that part was quite formidable. Anyways, with that done, my workload has been alleviated to some extent.. at least konti na lang gagawin bukas, quiz sa botany, MT and PE nlng, then its over... yehey! Byebye na for Christmas! I would not have gone through this week without the help of my peeps and my sole inspiration of course... :D :D (Never give up, kaya mo yan! I have faith in you...) God bless and Merry Christmas!

2005-12-14T23:05:00.000-08:00

Hellweek before Christmas

'Twas the week before Christmas, when all through house. Not a student was sleeping, not even a mouse... hahaha! It's pretty obvious from this point that we have been cramming our butts off just to cope up with monthly exams that were juxtaposed with our regular schedule.. grabe the university's system is really ticking me off! I don't think that organization and consideration for others' time and capabilities had ever been their practice... HAO SIAO tlaga!!! Anyway, I'm progressing through the third day of our examinations, and I just had a freaking bad time in Botany. I wonder how the heck are people supposed to ace such tests? Despite my sleepless nights in reviewing for today's ordeal, I found the practical and monthly examinations challenging (in other words, mahirap siya!). Oh well, I guess the subject's meant to be that way, hard as hell... As soon as we were free from the fiery maws of botany hell, we took a lunch break with my usual peeps hahaha! At the stroke of 1pm, we headed for the chemistry labs on the topmost floor. Well, the chem lab exam was fairly easy, although I have a feeling that could have made a mistake due to my persisting carelessness in solving problems! hahaha! Anyway, gotta study for chem lec now, God bless you all and good luck! btw, to that someone who has been kindling my spirit from the very start, keep on smiling and don't lose hope.. Merry Christmas!

2005-11-26T12:35:00.000-08:00

Such Sweet Sorrow...

As I arose from my slumber, the eternal orb of the east greeted my face with a stinging radiance; still, a hovering darkness enveloped the very core of my soul.. I felt as though I have just lost a drop of blood directly from my heart. Why such melancholy and anxiety do I harbor in myself on this hopeful day of Saturn? Oh, what a stranger am I to my own senses... Nevertheless, the day has just begun and I have much to attend to.

First off, I had planned to do my assignment in Botany so I eventually browsed through the pages of the book; and upon seeing the number of questions in store for me, I suddenly felt sluggish at first, but the thought of going to a homecoming later this evening motivated me to just get it over with now. Daunting the assignment may seem, but almost all the answers were found on the text! However, this feeling of sadness sat by my side once more. At that moment, only one thought paced on my mind then, that is to write a poem.. but to no avail, everything remained the same, I can still feel that twitch of pain and sorrow on my chest.. despite that, I continued with my work.

Soon afterwards, I got bored to a certain extent so I decided to play a movie in the pc while I do my homework, para masaya naman nang kaunti :P With these mixed emotions, I decided to watch "Shakespeare in Love".. so that it could melt my sadness away with a bit of comedy and love.. but I was only half-true for it totally melted my heart.. bumigay ang aking damdamin, kaya umiyak nalang ako.. *sniff* *sob* huhuhuhu! Haha! You can just imagine me sitting in front of my desk, with all my books open and I was simply pouring my heart out with only a roll of tissue paper as my sole comforter :P :P Haha! Tapos napatingin din si Cookie baby sa akin :P lol Mukhang bumagsak sa botany eh! Hahaha! Anywayz, I was not able to entirely finish the homework, but at least I have only three questions left :P

With the evening approaching fast, I hurried on to my room to dress up for the homecoming..and soon, I was on the way to Xavier. Upon arriving, I was glad to see some of my former batchmates.. ang daming pinagbago sa kanila, some had F4 hairdos, Columbian Cartel getups, and many other unthinkable styles..hahaha! When the program started, it was not as exciting as I had expected...although Iya was the host, boring pa rin eh, I bet she was feeling a bit out of place herself with all these "old guys" around :P Mukhang hindi sila nakakarelate sa pinaguusapan ng isang host dyan eh :P God! Could this day get any worse?!?! An hour later, Raymond, Kenneth, Raffy and I decided to leave the gathering and play a game of Warcraft to ease ourselves... everything ended well though. haha! Ayan! I guess that's it for today...I am simply hoping that everything will turn out right tomorrow.. God bless everyone.. good night and adieu my friends...

2005-11-25T22:43:00.000-08:00

Living a Semi-charmed Kind of Life

The second sem has finally come! As expected, the students satisfied their longing to see their beloved classmates once more on the first day... yes, everything was perfectly blissful and happy until the time came when school has "officially" started. Oh well, to cut the long story short, I'm performing fairly well in my subjects, yeah I was able to score a commendable one in botany, some in chem and hopefully, in math also. Haha! Having been given the feel of the second semester, I could only conclude that this sem is gonna suck big time! Why? first of all, the schedule is mercilessly giving me a hard time in coping up with an endless workload for every week. Secondly, some of my profs simply do not jive with the class's bright and high-spirited disposition... in other words, either sbra silang patay, nageemit ng sleeping gas, or they are just plain too serious with teaching :P Xcept of course si Sir Tsard, D best sya!!! yeah!

Fast forwarding, today was just like every other Friday for this sem: early dismissal, usual computer gaming sessions, and PE in the afternoon. During botany, we reviewed about cell physiology and stuff..quite boring to a certain extent but it never made me fall asleep.I really found Sir Vasquez funny in a weird way though.. hahaha! Eventually, English period came and we had a quiz..it was fairly easy, although I am not really quite sure with some of my answers, stilll i filled up all of the items. As the last subject (MT) was commencing, I barely had the intention of listening to Macmac's mommy, yet i did so when Jeremy told me that she's dictating the notes... hahaha! Anywayz, my DotA games were fun as usual, with, King, JJ, Harris, and Nic.. PE was alright too- learnt much about Sepak's history n stuff, yet i found it unproductive to just sit down and do nothing for two straight meetings, oh well, the course is going to officially begin its practical part next week :D Again, it's another day of smiles for me :) I only hope that my classmates had enjoyed the day as much as I did. :) God bless 1G-MT, Love you guys! Take care....

2005-10-25T20:50:00.000-07:00

Inefficiency at Its Best (An Innocent's Tale)

Okay, let's get one thing straight here..this particular day is just one of those days when luck decides to have a little retreat of its own; leaving hopeful innocents clamoring for their business to be over with so as to release them from their detention that seemed like an eternity.... basically, the prisoners who made it through this day of torment went home with famished looks, as if unspeakable horrors lurked within the confines of the place had siphoned the youth that lingered in their souls.

Hush! Take heed to the words that are written henceforth, for it is an account worth passing on to generations to come:

October 25, 2005- Daybreak: I woke up at around 5:30 AM so as to prepare for an early departure to school, because it is our enrollment day. Yes, I got all the necessary things for the registration and payment for the next semester, even before the sun had risen. Upon arriving at UST, I proceeded to the chapel where Hya and I agreed to rendevous before going into the seminary backyard for the enrollment..but she wasn't there yet, so I lingered a bit near the basketball court and spotted Jeremy with a few of my classmates including Taira, Lorelei and Sunshine (too bad Philip wasn't there yet. :P Hihi!). They were choosing their PE time and sport; thus, I joined them. Moments later, we learned that the queue for enrollment had begun even before 8AM, so we rushed in immediately to the usual red tents to line up. Everything was going smoothly, the line moved regularly, no interruptions whatsoever...until the time when the seniors and nursing students were "prioritized". What the heck?!?! Despite the fact that we (the freshmen) went there earlier, as in we were becoming closer to the front, they allowed them to go first! Isn't this enrollment following a first-come-first-serve basis?? So we thought out that UST definitely has a very unfair and inefficient enrollment system.. Damn I'm so pissed! To pass time, I had a few words with my former batchmmate and showed my yearbook to Taira and Lorelei..oh my, were they captivated to see Luch! :P haha! Things eventually became hasty when they announced that there will be a delay due to the technical problem that the computers have been experiencing. We waited for an hour and a half for a miracle to happen in the hope that it will be over soon, but I was wrong.. the students were condemned to spending one full day in UST's hellhole of doom.

Midday: Around 12NN, Jeremy and I decided to check out our grades online on the provided console, due to the undeniable fact that UST couldn't even come up with a stable site for viewing them online on our PCs. Soon, a large group of AB students marched into the lawn and followed the line of Pharmacy students. The sight of them made me feel even more disappointed for the freakin' university. They simply crammed everything under one day on one location...why can't they just schedule the enrollment per class or college? Why can't they even provide another venue for a particular college or so? Sheesh! Again, nothing happened...we waited...daydreamed...played hopscotch, laughed at John Kelly's immortal plethora of jokes...still, the line never moved. However, they had announced of recommencing the enrollment on 2pm... and so it has. From there, it's every man and woman for themselves. Many attempted to make singit, including Harris, Nic and I. The closer we got into the entrance, the more excited I became; yet, things got worse for us..Mother Nature had to take a leak! Just in time, we made it into the gym..soaking wet that is! :P And again, we had to consume two hours of our precious time just to wait for the lines in assessing and paying our tuition fees. At least my beloved 1G group was able to crack up a funny conversation about Harris whilst waiting :P Haha! Buti pa sila Hya and Monica tapos na by then!

Late afternoon: Soon afterwards, around 4pm, I could finally breathe with ease as the warm afternoon sun melted my boredom away..yet, I came out like a walking zombie..hungry and tired. Nic and I met up and decided to reward ourselves with a quick game of Warcraft with the usual addicts :P Haha! Playing a game of DotA could never shake my feeling of distress...

[ End of Journal ] P.S.: Experience it yourselves first-hand! haha!

Amen this UST! WAAAAAAAAAA!!! :

2005-10-18T22:33:00.000-07:00

Sembreak: Enjoying Boredom

The first semester is now over, and it all comes down to us sleeping our butts off, playing computer endlessly for days, etc.. Yes, the sembreak is finally here and there's so much fun and relaxing stuff to do before we resume our classes for the second semester on November. Well, the break is going fine for me. I have been going out with my high schools friends with the usual plan of playing LAN games, eating dinner together, and watching a movie afterwards. Huhuhuhu! :( I'm dreadfully missing my blockmates! At least the block is planning a little excursion to Enchanted Kingdom next week (sana makakasama ako). :P Hahaha! Don't wanna miss it for the world, bonding time again for the class.Despite all these, I spend most of the time daydreaming and chatting with my fellow buddies who are also moping around at home stuck with the same routine almost everyday.. I have to admit, the break is becoming suckier by the minute...there aren't much new things to look forward to each day; it's so monotonous. :( For now, I could only hope for better tomorrows that are as exciting as I have always dreamt of them to be! Ciao! :)

2005-10-11T03:27:00.000-07:00

Zoology's Low Blow

Tuesday, the second to the last day of hell week before everything's finally over. Having sufficiently slept for 7 freaking hours, I woke up at around 7:00 am to have a little recap of the chapters in our zoology book. The load itself was unbearable, still I had to go on with the onerous task of highlighting, outlining and memorizing several terms and processes. When the time came for me to leave, i felt "prepared" and ready to rock! Entering the room, my classmates looked like reanimated zombies (kulang sa tulog, duh!) :P, and they all were panicking on what to review and all kasi ang dami raw, kaya medyo kinabahan din ako. :P Pagdating ng test, grabe nangamote na lahat! "Holy shit!", "Ano ito?!?!", *scratches head*, *tumutulo na ang laway*, etc!!!! I saw everyone's heads shaking as if attempting to loosen their necks for a 360 degree turn so as to take a peek into others' paper. Speaking of looking at others' work, the 2nd half of the class had a hard time doing so.. cuz the prof's alert n all that.. (Damn! Fat chance!) Kaya yun, sabaw lahat ng utak namin pagkatpos ng test... celebrating na nakaperfect daw cla...perfect mistakes that is :P oh well, ganun talaga ang buhay...everything exists in harmony, light and dark, good and evil, easy and hard.... ang galing ni Lord.. praise Him for that. *Faints*

2005-10-08T20:41:00.000-07:00

Salavation Draws Near...

Finally, the weekend is upon us! The time has come to dump all our worries behind and look forward to a fun-filled weekend....NOT!!!! NOT A CHANCE IN HELL! Why? Obviously, our final exams await next week, that's what. Oh well, what can I do, that's life... This day has been quite a bore, I simply sat in front of my computer when I woke up in the morning and indulged in a little game of Warcraft.. and in the afternoon, I succumbed to my books' bidding to open them.. At least hindi ganun karami yng mga aaralin sa chemistry as compared to zoology. :P hehe. Still, i can't shake off that feeling na isang buong libro ang babasahin ko para sa finals! :(( Bahala na, konting tiis nlng and the pain would soon vanish like forgotten memory; and as what my friend would say, "Come what may na lang..." :) Haha.. I wish my class of 1G-MTthe best of luck in the exams cuz I really love them very much.. Naks! :P No doubt, my class is unique.... just like the rest of us all :P :P